Pay-offs for NOT Creating Our Desired Reality – Pay-off #6 Self-importance

Pay-off #6 Self importance

Why would we not want to create a successful reality? Why would we not want success, happiness, peace, fulfillment, and love?

Instead of success and happiness, we are seduced by pain and suffering. In our society, we have a belief, “No pain, no gain.” Usually we don’t change until our backs are against the wall, until we’ve reached “rock bottom,” when change becomes a must.

There are “pay-offs” for not creating a successful, prosperous, fulfilling, joyful reality. Usually we have one or two that is our go-to pay-off.

Families have a pay-off that run in the families that might also play out in our lives as well. Might not be our first go-to pay-off but pops up every now and then.

The seven pay-offs are:
Pay-off #1 – Avoidance
Pay-off #2 – Blame
Pay-off #3 – Self-pity
Pay-off #4 – Guarantee
Pay-off #5 – Self-righteous
Pay-off #6 – Self-importance
Pay-off #7 – Clinging to the past

Pay-off #6 – Self-importance- for Not Creating Our Reality

A life built on the sands of celebrity can be wrecked by the rains of reverses. A life built on the sands of materialism can be destroyed by the floods of adversity. A life built on the sands of pleasure can be blown down by the winds of disillusionment. Only the life that is built on the rock of character can withstand the tempests of time.


These people find their importance in life by being the worst of the worst and/or grander than the best. When you are relating an incident that happened to you, they are the type that have to top your story with a story that is twice as horrendous or magnificent as yours.

They have to outdo everything you do, compete with you…even though you were never competing or in competition with them in any way. They have to be better than you by either being the worst of the worst or the grandest of the grand.

In 2000, a woman asked if she paid my way, would I be her roommate on a two week trip to Peru with a spiritual teacher. Soon after departing, I was quick to realize why five of her friends declined the same offer. She had a morphine pump in her spine, feeding her morphine 24-hours a day. With everyone that sat down at her table for a meal, she went into her whole, painful medical history and problems.

Picture this: Machu Picchu, sunrise service with a shaman, she has a coughing fit. Does she remove herself from the group, walk away? No. Seven people went to her aid, offering water, cough drops, Reiki, to walk her over to an area where she could sit. She remained in the crowd, refusing any help…all while the shaman is still trying to conduct the ceremony.

Pay-off #6 – Self Importance…better than…worse than. Always a competition. Always proving how important they are. Always wanting the spotlight.

EFT tapping can help let go of this pay-off #6 – Self importance:
* I compete with everyone.
* I try to outdo everyone.
* I always have to be the best of the best.
* I always have to tell a story if I am told a story.
* I always seem to be the biggest loser in the room.

© Tessa Cason, 2021.

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